Saying goodbye

As I'm writing this ....tears are streaming down my face. That's how it's been most of the day today. Every time I think I have no more tears left... I'm mistaken. I have lots of tears to shed for my fur baby. She's been with me for about 13 years now. Traveled to Southern Illinois, Kentucky, Texas, Chicago and back to Texas and now her resting spot: Georgia. I'm sure this is never an easy decision for anyone. Today my heart is heavy and almost couldn't breathe after I made the appointment this morning. 

I was woken up around 6 a.m. this morning by Lotte. She needed to go out because she wasn't feeling good. It was happening again and I knew it was time. I don't want her to have a bad quality of life. She is having accidents in the house and feels horrible about it but can't control herself when she's not feeling well. I have prayed and prayed to God to give me a sign. And I feel like I got it.  I took her to the park today with Micah. I let her off the leash and we ran around together like old times. She seemed spunky and happy. I know my heart wants to keep thinking she's fine...but inside I know this is the right thing. Now I'm looking at her and trying my best to smile and love on her...but only tears come out. When I got her as a puppy, I could have never imagined how much I would love her. I am grateful to have been reading a book called, "Holding on to Hope" which says to always be grateful for the time God has given you with the ones you love. Isn't that a great way to look at it? Honestly, I am so grateful for the most loving, loyal, beautiful dog I could ever ask for. The hardest part for me is knowing there is no doggie heaven. She has no soul. She was made just for me to be here with me until I was ready to let her go. Saturday at 11:30 a.m. I hope you can all think of me while I bring her into the clinic. I will be with her the whole time. I'm so happy she can go peacefully and know that I love her.  It will take me a long time to get over her. She is the best dog ever. She has been a protector of all O'Neal babies since Averie. Keeping watch while they take naps and never leaving their side. 

To CharLotte:

I will always remember you as the little puppy who got so excited to see me she would tinkle. Oh Lotte Potty, you are so smart and loving. You care for every baby and always stay close. I trust you to always come back because you love me. You would never leave me. Anytime I see a squirrel I will think of how you would run after them and jump up the tree never giving up. Even jumping out of my car once to get a squirrel.. but it wasn't your time to leave me yet. You were my only friend when I moved to Kentucky to start my career. I was alone.. but when I got home you made me feel happy and loved.  If you only knew how much I care for you. That's why I have to let you go. You will leave this world but always be in my heart. 

Love you forever

Teddy Bear

What a fun weekend it was! I hope you all had some good ole fall fun. We did. Even though we had to throw our pumpkin out, which was sad, we are still happy to enjoy the fall weather and festivities.  For some reason I didn't remember that if you carve pumpkins too early in the south they go bad because the weather is too hot. So ours only lasted maybe 5 days and then we had to toss it. It was pretty nasty. Next year we are painting pumpkins for sure!!

After babysitting Saturday night for my neighbor, Leslie, I realized how much I want another baby. I have to say that Micah will be the best big brother. He just loved having Nolan over. He was so excited and didn't get jealous.. like I thought he might. This tells me I think he is ready for a sibling. Not going to be anytime soon, but I am hopeful. 

We had a neighborhood halloween festival and Micah had a great time running around being goofy and social. Baby Nolan loved it too. Craig held him most of them time and was able to watch some football with the guys. It was fun to have a 6 month old again. Happy babies are the best.  

The teddy bear hat didn't last very long. I guess I didn't think that through all the way. Everyone kept saying.. I think I know what he is. I'm like well...it's OK I tried. He's a teddy bear and I'm not very creative. This year I just bought a costume off the shelf. Hopefully he will care next year so maybe he can pick it out. 

When we got home around 6:40 p.m. Saturday night Micah was hungry and ate a ton of food. He was running around and so happy Nolan was there. I caught a little glimpse of that night ...Here's the video.

I was surprised how much Craig was helping with Nolan. He even wanted to feed him his bottle. I'm sure he secretly misses the bonding time with a baby too. It was just so sweet. 

Sunday we didn't go to church since Micah is still coughing a bit. We went out to brunch and then I got to run to Aldi. I picked up a little chair and a car rug for M. I couldn't resist. They have such good deals on toys it's hard to pass up. I still spent way less than I would have ever expected. I <3 aldi.="" nbsp="" p="">

Today it's a rainy mess and I don't feel like getting out in it. I found a story time at a library close by for tomorrow since I think it will be raining till Wednesday. I hope M likes it. Most of the story time events I see are for 3-5 years olds. This one is for littles but I feel like he may be the oldest one there. Do they not do story time for 2 year olds? Is it because of terrible two's? I find this odd. 

Anyways. Halloween is Saturday. I'm so thankful it is so we can trick or treat early in the day and be home before it's too late. 

Love you guys.

DD -Dunkin Donuts

Since M and I have been stuck home ALL week, we decided to get some much needed donuts this morning. Well, technically I had a croissant sandwich and M got some munchkins. As you can see in these pictures, he was a fan. He's still a little sick, but his spirits are up.

 Fist pump

He's back to two naps right now as he is fighting this cold. He went to sleep around 10:30 a.m. this morning and I got to chat with a friend going through some hard physical problems right now. It was meant to be. She seemed like she really needed to talk to someone. She hasn't figured out what's wrong with her yet, but that's the hardest part. I told her I only had excruciating pain for maybe a few days...but I can't imagine not being able to finally figure out what was wrong. Those few days seemed like the longest. I'm glad I'm here for her. She is such a sweet friend from Texas and actually her family lives here..right by me. Her mom even brought me a meal after I got out of the hospital. It's so nice to keep in touch with all those I have met along the way. I am praying she figures out what is wrong so she can go on with life. As we get older our bodies seem to not heal as quickly, or recover like we used too. It's sad to think about. Even the healthiest people out there get hit with chronic pain.

Speaking of pain...Micah decided to go head first down the slide and pretty much caught himself with his face. He was holding onto his snacks and thought it would be best to keep them safe before protecting his face. Poor guy. He's got some cuts all around from the mulch. I really think God gave me a boy first so I could know what to do when I have a girl. haha I think Micah is really tough when it comes to getting hurt. Thank goodness because my reaction time has slowed down along with my body. I'm getting old. I'm not quick on my feet any more. LOL

M and I have been hanging out outside a lot lately. I mean 75 degrees? It's enticing. Once you step outside and feel the cool breeze you never want to go back in. I'm loving this weather.

I'm also loving where I live. Now that Micah and I go for walks once sometimes twice a day I am getting to know more and more people around here.  I will have to take a pic of our new friend Sefton and Micah. They are so adorable together. Perfect ages. They like to imitate one another and it's  so sweet. 

Praying for my sister today, Hannah. She seems to have caught the flu. Ahhh. Is it that time already?? I need to go get the flu shot. I guess I know what I'm doing tomorrow. haha Poor thing. The weird thing is I don't think her kids got it...just her. And she stays at home. I'm thinking maybe she caught it from her Hubs. Anyways...the flu season is upon us. M already got his shot and I am praying I can escape this year's flu. We will see. 

Did I tell you guys Micah and I are going to Virginia soon? November 4th. I'm so excited. Micah will finally meet his GG Harris and Peter Wonderful. Might be the only time he ever gets to see them. I am so thankful we can go and be with them. He will love having all the attention on him. I will love it too. Thankful I can stay at home and be with this little man all day and take him around to see his family. 

Hope you all are having a wonderful week.

Pumpkin Patch

Saturday we went to Berry Pumpkin Patch in Woodstock. It was about a 30 minute drive and got there around 10:15 a.m.  It was seriously the perfect day to be outside. A chill in the air but the sun shining. Micah kept wanting to feed the cow and touch the chickens. We took a hayride to the pumpkin patch and picked a 28 pound pumpkin that costed around 30 bucks. HA I guess you pay for the experience. We had to pull Micah away form the fun around 11:30 and went to lunch. We stopped at Panera and it was wonderful. I don't know why but I haven't been to a lot since I don't have one close by (or one I have found yet). Soup felt so good after being outside. Micah loved the broccoli cheddar soup. He is really big on "dipping" right now. The problem is he doesn't take a bite ...he just kept dipping and eating the sauce or soup. It can be a little irritating sometimes. I know he'll get it soon. 

Here are some pics from the day:

 Micah finally cheesed it!! I said Cheese and he smiled!! woohoo. He's getting it :)

 He kept saying "ball" and trying to pick all the pumpkins up. It was really cute.

 Family photo

a taste for you

Micah and I took out all the guts on Saturday night and he loved it...like I knew he would. A little too much though. He kept trying to eat the seeds. I couldn't take my eye off of him or he was trying to eat another part of the pumpkin. sheesh.

Sunday night Craig got to carving the pumpkin while M and I watched out on the porch. We decided to carve "trick or treat" in the pumpkin since I couldn't find a design I liked. Here are my sweet pumpkins:

It's fun having a little one taking in everything. It makes doing these types of seasonal things much more enjoyable. It was way easier last year to get a cute picture with M and the pumpkins.. This year he just wouldn't sit still for a minute. How could you blame him? Too much to do and see.

Micah had a runny nose today and I'm hoping he gets better quick. I was just saying how long it's been since he was sick. Of course ...but we don't have much going on this week.  I took him to the dollar store today and got him a balloon. I was looking for cute decorations, but this dollar store wasn't the best. Seriously though you can't go wrong with a dollar balloon that's helium. You pay 4 or 5 at party city. The last time we had a balloon it was entertainment for weeks, so I'm hoping I get my money's worth. LOL

BRRR It's cold outside. Where am I? I feel like I'm back home. In Texas it didn't start feeling chilly till end of October, maybe even November. I am kind of enjoying the cool temps. Maybe it's because baggy clothes are my best friend right now. I need to get in gear and start working out but I have NO motivation. I keep saying.. ok lets do this and then all the sudden I'm day dreaming about if I'm going to make pumpkin pie or pecan pie. UGH. Why is food so good? Sometimes I just sit on Pinterest and look at all the workouts I want to do the next day. Then I feel like I did them without doing anything. haha That's the problem with Pinterest. I do love getting recipes though. Tonight I made an easy chicken meal that I could see myself making a lot in the future!! It was Chicken, swiss cheese, milk, can of cream of chicken soup and stove top stuffing. Pretty much just layer and put in over. I loved it. 

Click here for the recipe

I really hope you all had an amazing weekend. Halloween will be here before you know it and all the sudden my baby is going to be halfway to 2. ahhh Say it ain't so. Cherish the moments. I need to tell myself that on the days I'm just so tired. 

Love to all

Miss Lotte

Sometimes when I know Craig has to leave for work I think that it won't be much difference since I take care of Micah all day anyways. This week seems different. I feel worn out. Just that extra little time at night while Craig is giving him a bath is so nice for me. I feel defeated right now. I know many moms feel the same as I do most days. It's a tough pill to swallow. 

Wednesday I got home to a sick dog again. She's always had some issues and her tummy seems to be more sensitive as she is getting older. The last month or so she has been sick almost 5 times and I am giving her pumpkin regularly it seems like. I had come home from Bible study and wasn't feeling the best. I haven't really had great connections and I felt very distant from everyone. I try to open up so much that I think it scares people. I was talking to my dad on the way home and he lifted my spirits a bit (like he always does) but when I realized Lotte was sick and I had another mess to clean up I broke down. I thought that I couldn't do it anymore. I didn't have the time or patience to take her to the vet again and figure out what's wrong. I started balling my eyes out while I cleaned up the mess and ran downstairs and hysterically started crying while I searched out places that euthanize dogs. It was the first time I had EVER considered this option. Now I know that sounds harsh. And I am trying to figure out the best options. At the time it seems like the only one. I have no body to watch her while I'm gone because she gets nervous when she's not in her home and sometimes has "accidents" which it's because of her incontinence/kidney failure.  She's not a bad dog.. she's like the best dog that I have ever had and even ever known. Now it's Friday and she seems to be doing better. I can't take her on long walks anymore because I figured out it makes her body overheat and she leaks. I just don't know if staying inside all day and getting sick a lot is going to be a good life for her. Please pray that I can figure out the best plan. She has been with me since I was about 17 and this may be the hardest decision I will make thus far. 

 She loves Micah and he loves her. 

Yesterday I went to the dentist because I had been having some pain and thought it might be my wisdom teeth coming in. My neighbor Leslie watched Micah while he slept (she's the best) and I got to run out for a bit. I found out I have gingivitis and I really need a cleaning to get the plaque off so it can heal. She told me to floss, mouthwash and brush really good back there. She also gave me the referral to the oral surgeon but said I can get the consultation and take my time getting it done. That makes me feel better. I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't going to be in an emergency situation again. 

Thursday night we had a neighborhood mom/kid play date. I have the best neighbors and am so thankful to be able to walk and hang out. We went over to one of our mom's house who has a little yard with a slide. This was not planned, but the kids lined up by the door and posed for a picture.

This is Micah and Parker

 from Left to right:

Leslie, Nolan, Isabella, Parker, Micah, and Micah

We were able to hang out a bit after the kids went to bed which is a necessity. haha I really needed some mom time. Just sit and relax and talk. I don't get that much. Or at least doesn't seem like it. 

Craig is coming back tonight and hopefully we can make it to a pumpkin patch this weekend. I think Micah will love digging into pumpkin guts and getting messy. haha 

Love you all

 

The taste/ Birthday

On Saturday we went to the Taste of Suwanee and had a great time. Hannah did a 5k in the morning and got first place in her age group.  Congrats Hannah! Good job. You are the best runner in Suwanee!

It was a rainy morning and there was a chill in the air, but it was better than being extremely hot. 

We got to taste a few things and Micah loved to walk around and eat everything. He especially liked the bundt cakes. The place is called Nothing Bundt Cakes. They actually have them in Texas too. We really enjoyed them there. For a minute I didn't know where I was when I saw the booth. It was that time that I realize I move too much. Averie got to chase M around for a bit and it was so nice to have a little break. She is at a great age where she can help out with M. Direct him where to go and pick him up for a short amount of time if she needs to move him. 

Here they are sitting together. 

Micah and I took some selfies. 

He practically was either eating or running around. He really doesn't know how to just sit still anymore. When we were leaving it starting pouring down rain. It worked out really well. Right when we strapped M in the car he was out. The bad part is that when we got home he didn't want to sleep anymore. So it was a rough night. He went to sleep around 7 30p.m so at least I got some time at night. 

Sunday we decided to try a new church. We like the one we have been going too, but 30 mins away is getting tougher and tougher each week. We want to not have ANY excuses not to go. This new church is 15 mins away and was really easy to get too.

TUESDAY

My keyboard ran out of batteries yesterday, so I didn't get to finish my post! Now it's Tuesday and I need to say Happy Birthday to my one and only Craig Hooker!! He is seriously the best man for me. Not only is he a great dad and takes care of Micah and I. He is my best friend. I tell him everything (probably stuff he doesn't care about) and he always listens to me. He still makes me laugh after 6 years of marriage. I'm really glad I invested in a 24 hour comedian. It has paid off!!! I know he will still make me laugh for years to come. Laughing is one of my favorite things to do and I'm so glad I can laugh with someone the rest of my life! Love you babe<3 p="">

Micah and I went to the park yesterday and of course snapped a selfie together. This little guy is too much fun. His new words lately are: "uh oh" and "woah!" I think I say woah a lot. Also, he is still saying giggle when he tries to tickle you. It's really cute. 

Last night we met Craig at Aurelios Pizza for dinner. It was just what Craig wanted for his bday dinner. It was yummy!! He left this morning on a business trip and won't be back until Friday. I hope I can sleep tonight without hearing every little noise.  

During bath time last night Micah likes to put bubbles on his face. I told him he looks like Santa Claus...but he didn't get it. haha Soon maybe he will remember who Santa is. 

This morning I had a little walking date with 2 other moms in the neighborhood. It's that time of year that it is perfect to be outside. You need to layer though because it's cool in the morning and then gets hot in the sun come afternoon time. 

I think I am going to enjoy the fall here in GA. Seems a little cooler then Texas. 

Hope you all are having a great week.